1After the Sabbath, Mary Magdalene, James' mom, and Salome pulled up with some sweet spices to vibe check Jesus.

2Early AF on Sunday, they rolled to the tomb as the sun was rising.

3They were like, "Who’s gonna move the stone for us?"

4They looked and saw the stone was already moved—like, it was huge.

5When they went inside, they saw a young dude chilling on the right side, dressed in all white; they were shook.

6He was like, "Chill, don’t be scared. You’re looking for Jesus from Nazareth who got crucified—he's risen, not here. Check the spot where they laid him."

7"Now bounce and tell his disciples and Peter that he’s ahead of you in Galilee; you’ll see him just like he said."

8They dipped out fast, shook and amazed, and didn't tell anyone 'cause they were scared.

9When Jesus rose on Sunday, he first showed up to Mary Magdalene, outta whom he had cast seven demons.

10She went and spilled the tea to the homies who were mourning and crying.

11When they heard he was alive and seen by her, they were like, "Nah, no way."

12Then he showed up in another form to two of them while they were walking in the country.

13They went and told the rest, but they didn’t believe them either.

14Later, he showed up to the eleven as they were eating and called them out for their doubt and hard hearts for not believing those who saw him after he rose.

15He said, "Go into the whole world and spread the gospel to every living thing."

16Whoever believes and gets baptized will be saved; but whoever doesn’t believe is sus.

17These signs will follow the believers; in my name, they’ll cast out demons and speak new languages.

18They’ll handle snakes, and if they drink anything toxic, it won’t hurt them; they’ll lay hands on the sick, and they’ll bounce back.

19After he said all that, he was taken up into heaven and sat at God’s right hand.

20They went out and preached everywhere, with the Lord backing them up and confirming the word with signs. Amen.

1And when the sabbath was past, Mary Magdalene, and Mary the mother of James, and Salome, had bought sweet spices, that they might come and anoint him.

2And very early in the morning the first day of the week, they came unto the sepulchre at the rising of the sun.

3And they said among themselves, Who shall roll us away the stone from the door of the sepulchre?

4And when they looked, they saw that the stone was rolled away: for it was very great.

5And entering into the sepulchre, they saw a young man sitting on the right side, clothed in a long white garment; and they were affrighted.

6And he saith unto them, Be not affrighted: Ye seek Jesus of Nazareth, which was crucified: he is risen; he is not here: behold the place where they laid him.

7But go your way, tell his disciples and Peter that he goeth before you into Galilee: there shall ye see him, as he said unto you.

8And they went out quickly, and fled from the sepulchre; for they trembled and were amazed: neither said they any thing to any man; for they were afraid.

9Now when Jesus was risen early the first day of the week, he appeared first to Mary Magdalene, out of whom he had cast seven devils.

10And she went and told them that had been with him, as they mourned and wept.

11And they, when they had heard that he was alive, and had been seen of her, believed not.

12After that he appeared in another form unto two of them, as they walked, and went into the country.

13And they went and told it unto the residue: neither believed they them.

14Afterward he appeared unto the eleven as they sat at meat, and upbraided them with their unbelief and hardness of heart, because they believed not them which had seen him after he was risen.

15And he said unto them, Go ye into all the world, and preach the gospel to every creature.

16He that believeth and is baptized shall be saved; but he that believeth not shall be damned.

17And these signs shall follow them that believe; In my name shall they cast out devils; they shall speak with new tongues;

18They shall take up serpents; and if they drink any deadly thing, it shall not hurt them; they shall lay hands on the sick, and they shall recover.

19So then after the Lord had spoken unto them, he was received up into heaven, and sat on the right hand of God.

20And they went forth, and preached every where, the Lord working with them, and confirming the word with signs following. Amen.