Gen Z: Jeremiah 41
1So, in the seventh month, Ishmael, Nethaniah's son, and ten of his homies rolled up on Gedaliah, Ahikam's son, at Mizpah, and they shared some bread vibes together there.
2Then Ishmael and his crew straight up took out Gedaliah, Ahikam's son, with the sword, who was the Babylonian king's go-to guy for the land.
3Ishmael also took out all the Jews chillin' with Gedaliah at Mizpah, plus the Chaldeans and the warriors there.
4The next day after Gedaliah got taken out, no one knew what went down.
5Then some folks from Shechem, Shiloh, and Samaria, like eighty men with fresh shaves and ripped clothes, showed up with offerings and incense for the Lord’s house.
6Ishmael rolled out from Mizpah to meet them, crying the whole way, and when he met them, he was like, "Yo, come see Gedaliah, Ahikam's son."
7But when they got to the city, Ishmael took them out and tossed them into the pit, him and his crew.
8But ten dudes were like, "Chill, don’t slay us! We got treasures in the field—wheat, barley, oil, and honey." So he didn’t take them out.
9The pit where Ishmael dumped all the bodies was the one King Asa made for Baasha, and he filled it up with the slain.
10Then Ishmael kidnapped all the people left in Mizpah, including the king's daughters, and bounced to the Ammonites.
11When Johanan and his squad heard about all the savage stuff Ishmael did, they were shook.
12So they gathered their crew and went to confront Ishmael by the big waters at Gibeon.
13When all the peeps with Ishmael saw Johanan and his squad, they were hyped.
14All the people Ishmael had taken captive from Mizpah turned back and went to Johanan.
15But Ishmael dipped from Johanan with eight guys and headed to the Ammonites.
16Then Johanan and his crew took back the remnant from Ishmael, including the mighty warriors, women, kids, and eunuchs he brought back from Gibeon.
17They bounced and settled in Chimham, near Bethlehem, planning to head to Egypt.
18They were spooked by the Chaldeans since Ishmael had taken out Gedaliah, the Babylonian king's governor in the land.