Gen Z: Jeremiah 26
1In the beginning of Jehoiakim's reign, the Lord slid into his DMs with a message.
2God said, "Yo, stand in the Lord’s crib and spill the tea to all the Judah cities that pull up to worship. Don’t leave out a single word, fam."
3If they actually listen and bounce back from their bad vibes, I might chill on the plans I had for them 'cause of their sus actions.
4Tell them, "God's not vibing with you if you don’t follow my rules that I laid down for you."
5They gotta listen to my squad, the prophets I sent to you, but y’all just ghosted them.
6I’ll make this place like Shiloh and turn this city into a total curse for all the nations out there.
7The priests, prophets, and all the peeps caught Jeremiah dropping these bars in the Lord’s house.
8After Jeremiah finished his message, the priests and the prophets and everyone were like, "You’re dead, bro."
9They asked, "Why you prophesying that this house is gonna be like Shiloh and this city is gonna be empty? Everyone’s against Jeremiah in the Lord’s house."
10When the princes of Judah heard the scoop, they rolled up from the king’s house to the Lord’s house and sat at the new gate.
11The priests and prophets told the princes and everyone, "This dude deserves to die for what he said about this city, no cap."
12Jeremiah told all the princes and the crowd, "The Lord sent me to drop truth bombs about this house and city, just like you heard."
13So, fix your ways and listen to the Lord your God; then He’ll chill on the bad stuff He said about you.
14As for me, I’m in your hands: do what you think is lit.
15But know for sure, if you kill me, you’re bringing innocent blood on yourselves and this city, 'cause the Lord sent me to say all this to you.
16Then the princes and the crowd told the priests and prophets, "This dude isn’t worthy of death; he’s speaking to us in the name of our God."
17Some elders stood up and spoke to the whole assembly, saying,
18Micah the Morasthite dropped a prophecy during Hezekiah's reign, telling Judah, "God says Zion’s gonna be plowed like a field, and Jerusalem will be a mess, like a forest."
19Did Hezekiah and Judah really put him to death? He didn’t fear the Lord and prayed, and God changed His mind about the bad stuff He planned. We could be bringing serious trouble on ourselves.
20There was also a dude named Urijah, son of Shemaiah, who prophesied against this city and land just like Jeremiah.
21When King Jehoiakim and his crew heard him, they wanted him dead, but Urijah got scared and dipped to Egypt.
22Jehoiakim sent some guys to Egypt, including Elnathan, to bring him back.
23They pulled Urijah out of Egypt, brought him to Jehoiakim, who then took him out with the sword and tossed his body with the regular folks.
24But Ahikam, son of Shaphan, had Jeremiah's back so they wouldn’t hand him over to the people to be killed.