1Belshazzar the king threw a massive feast for a thousand of his homies and was vibing with some wine in front of the squad.

2While he was sipping the wine, Belshazzar was like, “Yo, bring me those gold and silver cups my dad Nebuchadnezzar jacked from the temple in Jerusalem,” so everyone could drink from them.

3They brought out the gold cups from God’s temple in Jerusalem, and the king, his crew, his wives, and their side pieces all drank from them.

4They were sipping wine and hyping up the gods of gold, silver, bronze, iron, wood, and stone.

5Outta nowhere, fingers appeared and started writing on the wall by the candlestick in the palace, and the king saw the hand that was doing the writing.

6The king’s face went from chill to shook, and he was totally freaking out, like his knees were knocking together.

7The king yelled for the astrologers, Chaldeans, and soothsayers to come through. He told the wise guys of Babylon that whoever could read the writing and spill the tea on what it meant would get dripped in scarlet and rock a gold chain, plus be the third ruler in the kingdom.

8All the king’s wise men rolled in, but they couldn’t read the writing or break down the meaning for the king.

9King Belshazzar was super stressed, his face changed, and his crew was totally shook.

10Then the queen walked in because of all the drama with the king and his crew, and she was like, “O king, live forever! Don’t let your thoughts mess with you or change your vibe.”

11There’s a dude in your kingdom with mad rizz, like he’s got the spirit of the holy gods. Back in the day, your dad found him lit with wisdom, like god-tier vibes, and Nebuchadnezzar made him the boss of all the magicians and soothsayers.

12This guy Daniel, who the king called Belteshazzar, had an excellent spirit, knowledge, and the ability to interpret dreams and solve tough problems. For real, let’s call him up; he’ll break it down for you.

13So, Daniel rolls up to the king, and the king’s like, “Yo, are you that Daniel from Judah, the one my dad brought out of exile?”

14I’ve heard you’ve got the spirit of the gods in you, and you’re packing some serious light, understanding, and wisdom. No cap.

15I brought in the wise guys and astrologers to read this writing and tell me what it means, but they couldn’t pop off with an interpretation.

16I heard you can interpret stuff and solve doubts. If you can read this writing and tell me what it means, I’ll hook you up with some fresh drip and make you the third ruler in the kingdom.

17Daniel was like, “Keep your gifts, king; give your rewards to someone else. I’ll still read the writing and let you know what it means.”

18Yo king, the most high God gave your dad Nebuchadnezzar a kingdom, majesty, glory, and honor, straight up.

19Because of the majesty he had, people, nations, and languages were shook, and they feared him. He could take lives or spare them, like total savage vibes.

20But when he got all prideful and his heart was lifted up, they took his throne away, and his glory got snatched.

21Dude got kicked out from the crew, his heart went full beast mode, chillin' with the wild donkeys. They fed him grass like he was a cow, and he was soaked with heaven's dew; until he realized the most high God was running the show, and He picks whoever He wants.

22Yo, Belshazzar, my dude, you didn’t even humble yourself, even though you knew all this tea.

23Instead, you flexed on the Lord of heaven; they brought out the holy vessels for you, and you, your homies, your queens, and sidepieces were sippin' wine from them. You praised the gods made of silver, gold, brass, iron, wood, and stone that can’t see or hear, while you forgot to give props to the God who holds your breath and controls your whole vibe.

24Then a hand popped up from Him, and this message was written.

25And here's the message that was written, MENE, MENE, TEKEL, UPHARSIN.

26Here’s the breakdown: MENE; God’s counted your kingdom, and it’s game over.

27TEKEL; You got weighed on the scale, and you came up short, no cap.

28PERES; Your kingdom's split up and handed to the Medes and Persians.

29Then Belshazzar was like, "Bet," and they dressed Daniel in red, threw some gold bling on him, and announced he’d be the third boss in the kingdom.

30That night, Belshazzar, the king of the Chaldeans, got taken out.

31Darius the Median snagged the kingdom at 62 years old. That's some serious rizz.

1Belshazzar the king made a great feast to a thousand of his lords, and drank wine before the thousand.

2Belshazzar, whiles he tasted the wine, commanded to bring the golden and silver vessels which his father Nebuchadnezzar had taken out of the temple which was in Jerusalem; that the king, and his princes, his wives, and his concubines, might drink therein.

3Then they brought the golden vessels that were taken out of the temple of the house of God which was at Jerusalem; and the king, and his princes, his wives, and his concubines, drank in them.

4They drank wine, and praised the gods of gold, and of silver, of brass, of iron, of wood, and of stone.

5In the same hour came forth fingers of a man’s hand, and wrote over against the candlestick upon the plaister of the wall of the king’s palace: and the king saw the part of the hand that wrote.

6Then the king’s countenance was changed, and his thoughts troubled him, so that the joints of his loins were loosed, and his knees smote one against another.

7The king cried aloud to bring in the astrologers, the Chaldeans, and the soothsayers. And the king spake, and said to the wise men of Babylon, Whosoever shall read this writing, and shew me the interpretation thereof, shall be clothed with scarlet, and have a chain of gold about his neck, and shall be the third ruler in the kingdom.

8Then came in all the king’s wise men: but they could not read the writing, nor make known to the king the interpretation thereof.

9Then was king Belshazzar greatly troubled, and his countenance was changed in him, and his lords were astonied.

10Now the queen, by reason of the words of the king and his lords, came into the banquet house: and the queen spake and said, O king, live for ever: let not thy thoughts trouble thee, nor let thy countenance be changed:

11There is a man in thy kingdom, in whom is the spirit of the holy gods; and in the days of thy father light and understanding and wisdom, like the wisdom of the gods, was found in him; whom the king Nebuchadnezzar thy father, the king, I say, thy father, made master of the magicians, astrologers, Chaldeans, and soothsayers;

12Forasmuch as an excellent spirit, and knowledge, and understanding, interpreting of dreams, and shewing of hard sentences, and dissolving of doubts, were found in the same Daniel, whom the king named Belteshazzar: now let Daniel be called, and he will shew the interpretation.

13Then was Daniel brought in before the king. And the king spake and said unto Daniel, Art thou that Daniel, which art of the children of the captivity of Judah, whom the king my father brought out of Jewry?

14I have even heard of thee, that the spirit of the gods is in thee, and that light and understanding and excellent wisdom is found in thee.

15And now the wise men, the astrologers, have been brought in before me, that they should read this writing, and make known unto me the interpretation thereof: but they could not shew the interpretation of the thing:

16And I have heard of thee, that thou canst make interpretations, and dissolve doubts: now if thou canst read the writing, and make known to me the interpretation thereof, thou shalt be clothed with scarlet, and have a chain of gold about thy neck, and shalt be the third ruler in the kingdom.

17Then Daniel answered and said before the king, Let thy gifts be to thyself, and give thy rewards to another; yet I will read the writing unto the king, and make known to him the interpretation.

18O thou king, the most high God gave Nebuchadnezzar thy father a kingdom, and majesty, and glory, and honour:

19And for the majesty that he gave him, all people, nations, and languages, trembled and feared before him: whom he would he slew; and whom he would he kept alive; and whom he would he set up; and whom he would he put down.

20But when his heart was lifted up, and his mind hardened in pride, he was deposed from his kingly throne, and they took his glory from him:

21And he was driven from the sons of men; and his heart was made like the beasts, and his dwelling was with the wild asses: they fed him with grass like oxen, and his body was wet with the dew of heaven; till he knew that the most high God ruled in the kingdom of men, and that he appointeth over it whomsoever he will.

22And thou his son, O Belshazzar, hast not humbled thine heart, though thou knewest all this;

23But hast lifted up thyself against the Lord of heaven; and they have brought the vessels of his house before thee, and thou, and thy lords, thy wives, and thy concubines, have drunk wine in them; and thou hast praised the gods of silver, and gold, of brass, iron, wood, and stone, which see not, nor hear, nor know: and the God in whose hand thy breath is, and whose are all thy ways, hast thou not glorified:

24Then was the part of the hand sent from him; and this writing was written.

25And this is the writing that was written, MENE, MENE, TEKEL, UPHARSIN.

26This is the interpretation of the thing: MENE; God hath numbered thy kingdom, and finished it.

27TEKEL; Thou art weighed in the balances, and art found wanting.

28PERES; Thy kingdom is divided, and given to the Medes and Persians.

29Then commanded Belshazzar, and they clothed Daniel with scarlet, and put a chain of gold about his neck, and made a proclamation concerning him, that he should be the third ruler in the kingdom.

30In that night was Belshazzar the king of the Chaldeans slain.

31And Darius the Median took the kingdom, being about threescore and two years old.