1So Pilate straight up took Jesus and gave him a savage beatdown.

2The soldiers flexed and made a crown of thorns, tossed it on his head, and draped him in a purple robe, no cap.

3They were like, "Hail, King of the Jews!" and slapped him around.

4Pilate came out again, saying, "Yo, check it, I’m bringing him to you so you know I see no issues with him."

5Then Jesus came out rocking the crown of thorns and the purple robe. Pilate was like, "Look at this dude!"

6When the chief priests and officers peeped him, they started screaming, "Crucify him, crucify him!" Pilate was like, "You handle it, I see no fault in him."

7The Jews shot back, "We got a law, and according to that, he’s gotta die for claiming he’s the Son of God."

8When Pilate heard that, he got even more shook.

9He went back into the judgment hall and asked Jesus, "Where you from?" But Jesus was like, "Silence."

10Then Pilate was like, "You not gonna talk to me? Don’t you know I can crucify you or let you go?"

11Jesus was like, "You only got power over me 'cause it was given from above, no cap. The dude who turned me in? Way bigger sin vibes."

12After that, Pilate was tryna set him free, but the Jews were like, "If you let this guy go, you ain't a friend of Caesar. Anyone claiming to be a king is totally sus."

13When Pilate heard that, he brought Jesus out and sat down at the judgment spot called Pavement, or Gabbatha in Hebrew.

14It was Passover prep time, around six o'clock, and he said to the Jews, "Yo, check out your King!"

15But they were like, "Get rid of him, crucify him!" Pilate asked, "Should I crucify your King?" The chief priests were savage, saying, "We only got Caesar as our king."

16So, he gave Jesus up to them to be crucified. They took him and led him away, for real.

17Jesus was carrying his cross, heading to this spot called the place of a skull, which is Golgotha in Hebrew.

18They crucified him there, with two others, one on each side, and Jesus in the middle, just vibin'.

19Pilate wrote a sign and put it on the cross that said, "JESUS OF NAZARETH THE KING OF THE JEWS."

20A lot of Jews saw that sign because the spot where Jesus was crucified was super close to the city, and it was in Hebrew, Greek, and Latin.

21Then the chief priests were like, “Yo Pilate, don’t write ‘The King of the Jews’; just say He claimed to be King of the Jews.”

22Pilate was like, “What I wrote, I wrote. No cap.”

23After they crucified Jesus, the soldiers were like, “Let’s split His drip into four parts,” and His coat was all seamless and lit.

24They were chatting, “Let’s not tear it; let’s roll dice for it,” so the scripture would pop off, saying, “They split my fits among them, and for my swag they cast lots.” So that’s what the soldiers did.

25Standing by the cross was Jesus’ mom, her sister, Mary the wife of Cleophas, and Mary Magdalene, just vibing.

26When Jesus saw His mom and the disciple He vibed with, He said, “Woman, check out your son!”

27Then He told the disciple, “Yo, that’s your mom now!” And from then on, that disciple took her home.

28After this, Jesus knew everything was done so the scripture would be fulfilled, and He said, “I’m thirsty, fr.”

29They had a vessel full of vinegar, and they soaked a sponge in it, put it on hyssop, and offered it to His mouth.

30After He took the vinegar, Jesus was like, “It’s finished,” then bowed His head and ghosted.

31The Jews were like, "Yo, we gotta get those bodies down from the cross before the sabbath hits, it’s a whole vibe," so they asked Pilate to break their legs and take them away.

32Then the soldiers showed up and broke the legs of the first guy and the other dude who was crucified with him.

33But when they got to Jesus and saw He was already gone, they didn’t break His legs, fr.

34But one of the soldiers took a spear and pierced His side, and out came blood and water, no cap.

35The dude who saw it is keeping it 100; his record is true, and he knows what he’s saying so you can believe it.

36All this went down to make sure the scripture was on point, like, "A bone of Him shall not be broken."

37And again, another scripture says, "They shall look on Him whom they pierced," periodt.

38After this, Joseph of Arimathea, a secret disciple of Jesus 'cause he was lowkey scared of the Jews, asked Pilate if he could take Jesus' body, and Pilate was like, "Bet." So he came and took the body.

39Nicodemus also rolled up, the dude who first came to Jesus at night, bringing a mix of myrrh and aloes, like a hundred pounds worth.

40Then they took the body of Jesus and wrapped it in linen with the spices, just how the Jews do when they bury someone.

41So where they nailed him, there was this garden, and in it, a fresh tomb that nobody's vibed in yet.

42They put Jesus there 'cause it was the Jews' prep day, and the tomb was super close, no cap.

1Then Pilate therefore took Jesus, and scourged him.

2And the soldiers platted a crown of thorns, and put it on his head, and they put on him a purple robe,

3And said, Hail, King of the Jews! and they smote him with their hands.

4Pilate therefore went forth again, and saith unto them, Behold, I bring him forth to you, that ye may know that I find no fault in him.

5Then came Jesus forth, wearing the crown of thorns, and the purple robe. And Pilate saith unto them, Behold the man!

6When the chief priests therefore and officers saw him, they cried out, saying, Crucify him, crucify him. Pilate saith unto them, Take ye him, and crucify him: for I find no fault in him.

7The Jews answered him, We have a law, and by our law he ought to die, because he made himself the Son of God.

8When Pilate therefore heard that saying, he was the more afraid;

9And went again into the judgment hall, and saith unto Jesus, Whence art thou? But Jesus gave him no answer.

10Then saith Pilate unto him, Speakest thou not unto me? knowest thou not that I have power to crucify thee, and have power to release thee?

11Jesus answered, Thou couldest have no power at all against me, except it were given thee from above: therefore he that delivered me unto thee hath the greater sin.

12And from thenceforth Pilate sought to release him: but the Jews cried out, saying, If thou let this man go, thou art not Cesar’s friend: whosoever maketh himself a king speaketh against Cesar.

13When Pilate therefore heard that saying, he brought Jesus forth, and sat down in the judgment seat in a place that is called the Pavement, but in the Hebrew, Gabbatha.

14And it was the preparation of the passover, and about the sixth hour: and he saith unto the Jews, Behold your King!

15But they cried out, Away with him, away with him, crucify him. Pilate saith unto them, Shall I crucify your King? The chief priests answered, We have no king but Cesar.

16Then delivered he him therefore unto them to be crucified. And they took Jesus, and led him away.

17And he bearing his cross went forth into a place called the place of a skull, which is called in the Hebrew Golgotha:

18Where they crucified him, and two other with him, on either side one, and Jesus in the midst.

19And Pilate wrote a title, and put it on the cross. And the writing was, JESUS OF NAZARETH THE KING OF THE JEWS.

20This title then read many of the Jews: for the place where Jesus was crucified was nigh to the city: and it was written in Hebrew, and Greek, and Latin.

21Then said the chief priests of the Jews to Pilate, Write not, The King of the Jews; but that he said, I am King of the Jews.

22Pilate answered, What I have written I have written.

23Then the soldiers, when they had crucified Jesus, took his garments, and made four parts, to every soldier a part; and also his coat: now the coat was without seam, woven from the top throughout.

24They said therefore among themselves, Let us not rend it, but cast lots for it, whose it shall be: that the scripture might be fulfilled, which saith, They parted my raiment among them, and for my vesture they did cast lots. These things therefore the soldiers did.

25Now there stood by the cross of Jesus his mother, and his mother’s sister, Mary the wife of Cleophas, and Mary Magdalene.

26When Jesus therefore saw his mother, and the disciple standing by, whom he loved, he saith unto his mother, Woman, behold thy son!

27Then saith he to the disciple, Behold thy mother! And from that hour that disciple took her unto his own home.

28After this, Jesus knowing that all things were now accomplished, that the scripture might be fulfilled, saith, I thirst.

29Now there was set a vessel full of vinegar: and they filled a spunge with vinegar, and put it upon hyssop, and put it to his mouth.

30When Jesus therefore had received the vinegar, he said, It is finished: and he bowed his head, and gave up the ghost.

31The Jews therefore, because it was the preparation, that the bodies should not remain upon the cross on the sabbath day, (for that sabbath day was an high day,) besought Pilate that their legs might be broken, and that they might be taken away.

32Then came the soldiers, and brake the legs of the first, and of the other which was crucified with him.

33But when they came to Jesus, and saw that he was dead already, they brake not his legs:

34But one of the soldiers with a spear pierced his side, and forthwith came there out blood and water.

35And he that saw it bare record, and his record is true: and he knoweth that he saith true, that ye might believe.

36For these things were done, that the scripture should be fulfilled, A bone of him shall not be broken.

37And again another scripture saith, They shall look on him whom they pierced.

38And after this Joseph of Arimathea, being a disciple of Jesus, but secretly for fear of the Jews, besought Pilate that he might take away the body of Jesus: and Pilate gave him leave. He came therefore, and took the body of Jesus.

39And there came also Nicodemus, which at the first came to Jesus by night, and brought a mixture of myrrh and aloes, about an hundred pound weight.

40Then took they the body of Jesus, and wound it in linen clothes with the spices, as the manner of the Jews is to bury.

41Now in the place where he was crucified there was a garden; and in the garden a new sepulchre, wherein was never man yet laid.

42There laid they Jesus therefore because of the Jews’ preparation day; for the sepulchre was nigh at hand.