1If there's drama between peeps and they hit up the judge, the judges gotta keep it real; they’ll back the righteous and call out the wicked.

2If a wicked dude deserves a beatdown, the judge will have him lay down and take it right there, based on what he did, with a set number of hits.

3He can only give him forty stripes, no cap: if he goes overboard and beats him too much, it’ll just make your bro look bad.

4Don’t put a muzzle on the ox while it’s grinding the corn, that’s sus.

5If brothers are living together and one dies without kids, the dead guy's wife can’t just marry someone random; his bro needs to step up and take her as his wife, doing his bro duties.

6The first kid she has will carry on the name of the dead bro, so his name doesn’t fade from Israel, periodt.

7If the dude isn’t down to take his bro’s wife, she should go to the gate and tell the elders, "My husband’s bro is being a no-show about raising a name for my husband."

8Then the city elders will call him and talk it out; if he’s like, “Nah, I don’t wanna take her,”

9His bro’s wife will come to him in front of the elders, take off his shoe, spit in his face, and say, “This is what happens to a dude who won’t build up his bro’s house.”

10His name will be known in Israel as "The house of the guy who had his shoe taken off."

11When guys are throwing hands and one’s wife tries to save her man from the one hitting him, putting her hand out and grabbing him where it hurts:

12You gotta cut off her hand; don’t feel sorry for her, fr.

13Don’t have different weights in your bag, that’s shady.

14Don’t keep different measures in your house, that’s also sus.

15Just have straight-up weights and measures, so you can live long in the land the Lord your God is giving you.

16Anyone doing this stuff or acting unrighteous is an abomination to the Lord your God, for real.

17Remember what Amalek did to you on the way when you were leaving Egypt;

18How he ambushed you and hit the weak ones at the back when you were tired and worn out, and he didn’t fear God.

19So when the Lord your God gives you rest from all your enemies in the land He’s giving you to inherit, make sure to wipe Amalek’s name from under heaven; don’t forget it, no cap.

1If there be a controversy between men, and they come unto judgment, that the judges may judge them; then they shall justify the righteous, and condemn the wicked.

2And it shall be, if the wicked man be worthy to be beaten, that the judge shall cause him to lie down, and to be beaten before his face, according to his fault, by a certain number.

3Forty stripes he may give him, and not exceed: lest, if he should exceed, and beat him above these with many stripes, then thy brother should seem vile unto thee.

4Thou shalt not muzzle the ox when he treadeth out the corn.

5If brethren dwell together, and one of them die, and have no child, the wife of the dead shall not marry without unto a stranger: her husband’s brother shall go in unto her, and take her to him to wife, and perform the duty of an husband’s brother unto her.

6And it shall be, that the firstborn which she beareth shall succeed in the name of his brother which is dead, that his name be not put out of Israel.

7And if the man like not to take his brother’s wife, then let his brother’s wife go up to the gate unto the elders, and say, My husband’s brother refuseth to raise up unto his brother a name in Israel, he will not perform the duty of my husband’s brother.

8Then the elders of his city shall call him, and speak unto him: and if he stand to it, and say, I like not to take her;

9Then shall his brother’s wife come unto him in the presence of the elders, and loose his shoe from off his foot, and spit in his face, and shall answer and say, So shall it be done unto that man that will not build up his brother’s house.

10And his name shall be called in Israel, The house of him that hath his shoe loosed.

11When men strive together one with another, and the wife of the one draweth near for to deliver her husband out of the hand of him that smiteth him, and putteth forth her hand, and taketh him by the secrets:

12Then thou shalt cut off her hand, thine eye shall not pity her.

13Thou shalt not have in thy bag divers weights, a great and a small.

14Thou shalt not have in thine house divers measures, a great and a small.

15But thou shalt have a perfect and just weight, a perfect and just measure shalt thou have: that thy days may be lengthened in the land which the Lord thy God giveth thee.

16For all that do such things, and all that do unrighteously, are an abomination unto the Lord thy God.

17Remember what Amalek did unto thee by the way, when ye were come forth out of Egypt;

18How he met thee by the way, and smote the hindmost of thee, even all that were feeble behind thee, when thou wast faint and weary; and he feared not God.

19Therefore it shall be, when the Lord thy God hath given thee rest from all thine enemies round about, in the land which the Lord thy God giveth thee for an inheritance to possess it, that thou shalt blot out the remembrance of Amalek from under heaven; thou shalt not forget it.